Pact, An Adoption Alliance - What Pact Believes Every Birth Parent Should Know

What Pact Believes Every Birth Parent Should Know

When you decide to place your baby for adoption, you have many options and choices about the type of adoption you can pursue. Choosing which agency or professional to work with is part of the choice. You need to understand their policies about birth parents choosing the adoptive parents, and how ongoing contact between birth and adoptive parents is handled (i.e. direct, through the professional or not at all). You should find out about all the possible choices and be careful not to close doors that you may later wish you had left open. Below are answers to some common questions birth parents ask Pact.

Will Anyone Want To Adopt My Baby?
Many people want to adopt and no two are alike. There are couples-and singles. Some are the same race as your baby-others adopt across racial lines. Some are waiting for their first child-others have kids already. Some want to have a lot of contact with you-others won't. The fact that you are carrying a child of color will also play a role. There are families who are interested in adopting same race children as well as families interested in adopting children across racial lines (which is called transracial adoption). If you decide to consider transracial adoption, you will want to find out how the adoptive parents will address your child's racial identity and pride.

How Much Does It Cost?
Adoption services are normally free to birth parents. Adoptive parents pay fees to professionals and in some states, they may also assist with specific birth parent expenses. Adoptive parents sometimes pay for counseling, medical costs, legal costs, transportation, and living expenses related to your pregnancy. You are entitled to ask the professionals you work with what fees they are charging adoptive parents. For example, Pact charges adoptive parents a single fee for all services on a sliding scale ranging from zero to $3,000.

Can I Meet The Family? Can I See The Baby?
You should be in charge of what happens. You will want to consider the advantages of seeing the baby, but it is not required. Many birth parents find their grief and pain from the placement easier to resolve if they have taken the opportunity to spend time with and say good-bye to their child.

Will My Child Hate Me Because I Chose Adoption?
Your child will want to understand why. He or she will want to know that you acted in his or her best interest. The most important information will be the knowledge that you worked very hard to make the right decision, that you considered his or her needs before your own. Pact believes that children do best when they are able to maintain some connection with their birth family members.

How Do I Know Who Will Be Good Parents?
Adoptive parents must be approved by a state-required home study and must undergo a criminal record search. Some do this before you choose them and others afterwards. You must ask for full disclosure of information you need. You can choose to talk with prospective parents and meet them (usually at the time of the birth) and decide for yourself.

What If I Change My Mind?
This may be the hardest decision you will ever make. Since you will be deciding not only for yourself but for your baby and the adoptive parents, it is important to be as sure as you can possibly be that adoption is the right plan before you select an adoptive family. Nevertheless, you will retain the legal right to change your mind and reclaim custody without explanation until you sign your consent to the adoption after your baby is born.

Who Or What Is Pact?
Pact helps children of African American, Latino, Asian, Native American and multiracial heritage, born in the US, find access to families yearning to adopt. Pact crosses geographic and institutional barriers, connecting children and parents who could not otherwise be united as family. Pact believes that birth parents have the right to choose the family who will adopt their baby. Women (parents) of color deserve the same choices, control and respect as any others who choose adoption. Pact recruits families who want to adopt children of color as their first choice.

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